Speed dating

Someone suggested to me to try speed dating and stop trying to wait for love to drop from the sky.  However, I have my reservations on speed dating as these is how I think I approach speed dating.  In the end, I didnt give it a try (it costs too much too!)

Speed dating - How it work? Most of us know how it works mechanically but I will also elaborate on how it works mentally. Another question, can it really work? Is 10 minutes adequate to assess whether you would like to know the person better?

Mechanically - 10 different people from each sex is selected based on their specified criteria and put together in a room. There will be 10 tables and every 7 - 10 minutes (depending on the organisation), they will rotate tables so that each one will get to know each other. At the end of the 10 minutes, each person has to write on their sheet whether they would like to know that particular person. After completing the 10 rounds, the organiser will collect each individual sheet and match the results. If two people tick YES, then the organiser will give both parties their e-mail / contact information.

Mentally - Once selected, you spend days deciding what to wear and wondering how your potential 10 suitors look like. You prepare yourself on the criteria that appeal you. Once arrived, you are given half an hour to mingle with your suitors prior to starting the speed dating. Your main criterion is of course physical attractiveness although you might have mentally prepared yourself to look beyond that. In fact in that half hour, you already have subconsciously 'picked' those that are of your interest and eliminate those that are not. You will also have checked out your other 9 competitors. You might feel threatened by the more attractive competitor and start changing your 'game plan'. Once the bell ring for the speed dating to start, you find yourself starting off with plain formality but your body language already indicate your initial assessment of the suitors. The suitors that are of your interest are asked questions that pertain to your criteria whilst those that you have subconsciously eliminated, you do not even bother to get to know them. I am sure to some of you, this definitely ring a bell whilst some of you will deny being so shallow. I am not saying this is everyone's mentality but definitely a commonality when going for a speed date.

Can it Work - I do not run a speed dating organisation, therefore I do not have concrete statistics on the outcome. My views are basically from my observation and reality TV shows. The Bachelor and The Bachelorette is a variation of Speed Dating. At the end of the night, the Bachelor/Bachelorette has to make their choice on who would or would not receive their roses. By the end of several weeks, the ONE is chosen and is being proposed. From the statistic of these two reality TV, so far, only one couple got married and had kids. The rest of the couples separate once the hype of filming or should I put it 'glamour pretending' period is over. My point is, one meeting as short as 10 minutes is really not adequate to really know a person. Usually at the first meeting, majority of us are not really ourselves. We put on our best, afraid because we want to make the best impression.

So can we make it work? I have no fail prove answer except BE YOU even at the first meeting. If your suitor still picked you when you are being yourself, then there is definitely a chance that the relationship could work as it is based on honesty and transparency from the start.